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Tales of Fail Thread 
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pcernie wrote:
Amnesia10 wrote:
phantombudgie wrote:
There are 42 pages of fail in the meeting place, and only 22 pages of win. Are we just really grumpy?

Just realistic. ;)


There's a lot of it about, unfortunately :(

I Would rather be realistic than deluded. It can be helpful when dealing with problems.


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Wed Aug 17, 2011 12:27 am
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Gah! Seems now that I can't even cook fishfingers!

Left mine in the grille and the iphone alarm doesn't go off to remind me to check it. Supposed to be approx 8 mins per side. Left it on one side for 30 mins! :oops:

Scraped off the burnt breadcrumb coating to reveal burnt fish underneath! Still ate them though!

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 7:54 pm
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Want to scream.
There's a fault somewhere on my car's indicator circuit and I'm [LIFTED] if I can find it.
Took her to an auto-electrician today who scratched his head, told me to check if the bulbs are the same wattage and sent me away again.

(There's video here of what's happening, if you're curious and suddenly can offer the solution.)

So, I've been out in the garage, undoing housings, checking light fittings, checking the relay (which was hidden away under the dash behind a metal bar that I've removed and now can't refit) and when I go to restart her to put her away... she won't start. She's on charge. I'm guessing I need a new battery as well as whatever's going on.
FFFFFFffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuu

:x :x :x :x

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 8:50 pm
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Judging by the battery (and seeing the effect my air con/lights/speakers have on the drain when turned on) might just be a duff battery?

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 8:59 pm
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Dunno - checked the indicators with the battery on charge (so should be a healthy level) and it's the same problem. I suspect the battery issue is independent of the indicator issue.

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:22 pm
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ProfessorF wrote:
I suspect the battery issue is independent of the indicator issue.

If the battery is draining then the relay might be stuck on. Have you tried hitting it? If you unplug it you should be able to test it easily with a PP3 battery.

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:24 pm
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OK I just watched your video and my opinion has changed. I'm with Fin and with the garage - change the battery. The voltage should not dip that much with just the indicators, and the differing flash rate does suggest one of the bulbs is bad.

Does it do exactly the same with the engine running?

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:34 pm
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JJW009 wrote:
OK I just watched your video and my opinion has changed. I'm with Fin and with the garage - change the battery. The voltage should not dip that much with just the indicators, and the differing flash rate does suggest one of the bulbs is bad.

Does it do exactly the same with the engine running?


Yes, that video was shot with the engine running as a matter of fact. :)
It's the same with it switched off as well.

JJW009 wrote:
If the battery is draining then the relay might be stuck on. Have you tried hitting it? If you unplug it you should be able to test it easily with a PP3 battery.


Ooh good call. I've a new one arriving tomorrow anyway, so it's getting replaced regardless.
Thing is, the same relay unit operates both left and right indicators. The left hand side is fine and dandy, the right hand side isn't.
And when the hazards are switched on, which uses a separate relay, the lights flash randomly instead of a steady pulse.
As both the hazard unit and the indicator flash unit are sent via the indicator switch mechanism on the steering column, wouldn't fault would seem to be in the indicator switch unit?

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:39 pm
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ProfessorF wrote:
And when the hazards are switched on, which uses a separate relay, the lights flash randomly instead of a steady pulse.
As both the hazard unit and the indicator flash unit are sent via the indicator switch mechanism on the steering column, wouldn't fault would seem to be in the indicator switch unit?

OK that's nasty, but yes I see your logic. If the heater current comes from the stick and that's dirty or corroded, then it could cause delays and randomness.

I don't fancy stripping that down (or rather putting it together again) but a gentle clean with a soft pencil would probably fix it.

The remaining diagnoses is worse - "the loom".

By the way, I know nothing about cars but I do know a bit about electrics. The auto side of that mostly learned 35 years ago from my dad when I was in short trousers :lol:

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:48 pm
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JJW009 wrote:
OK that's nasty, but yes I see your logic. If the heater current comes from the stick and that's dirty or corroded, then it could cause delays and randomness.

I don't fancy stripping that down (or rather putting it together again) but a gentle clean with a soft pencil would probably fix it.

The remaining diagnoses is worse - "the loom".

By the way, I know nothing about cars but I do know a bit about electrics. The auto side of that mostly learned 35 years ago from my dad when I was in short trousers :lol:


The switch unit itself looks like this -
Image

I think I'd rather buy a new one.

And yes, what I need now is someone who knows more about 'lectrics than I do. It's hugely frustrating. Working on the car is even worse, as nothing's easy to get to and your wrists don't bend the right way and you remove something that you can't put back on, oh and some cables that start as one colour at the fuse box don't necessarily stay that colour by the time they get to where they're going.
Add to all this, and I know that someone's been at it from what I can see under the dash, and the imaginative way in which someone's installed the fog lamp and switch (not a requirement in the US, but is over here).

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:55 pm
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Well, the relay wasn't that costly and at least we'll know if that was the fault or not. You may even get to eBay it for more than you paid.

Of course, to diagnose this efficiently what you really need is super-thin extendible arms and a 10 channel storage 'scope ;)

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 10:21 pm
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Can't see the picture you posted Alex.

I've had a problem with a stalk switch unit before, unexpected results basically. It turns out there was grease/grime doing all sorts of weird stuff in the unit with regard to the contacts. It was a sealed unit but I managed to open it up, clean and then reassemble. Solved the problem and saved some money as well. From that day I've always said that 'there ain't no such thing as a sealed unit.'

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Thu Aug 18, 2011 7:44 am
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If the battery is buggered, the impedance will probably be totally buggered as well. If the battery impedance has dropped though, it would drastically affect all of your other systems.

Any chance you can swap the indicator stalks into the opposite sides of the relay? If the problem is with the right hand side of the relay, you should then see the problem swap on to the left hand indicator. If the problem doesn't swap stalks, my money would be then be on the switch in the stalk or the wiring to the relay.

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Thu Aug 18, 2011 2:58 pm
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Got a new battery for her today, new flasher unit arrived as well. I'm reluctant to stick the new battery in right away, because the tray is badly corroded.
But that's ok because guess what's turning up tomorrow? A new battery tray.
I can certainly stick the new flasher on though and see what happens.

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Thu Aug 18, 2011 8:56 pm
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reckon its anything to do with mapping? or the software the way its configured etc? :cry:

edit: nvm :cry:

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Thu Aug 18, 2011 9:19 pm
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